To The Doctors & Nurses

As the days approach to the anniversary of Jacks death, I have been reliving those last few days of his all too short life. Your job as parent is to protect your children so when they die, you are filled with….

“What if’” “Should we have” “Could we have”

Was there something we could have done?
Was there something we should have done?
Should we have known that there something was seriously wrong with Jack?
When I took this photo of him sleeping, I had no idea that life was going to change forever.

I have been thinking about the doctors and nurses that worked on Jack in Accident & Emergency at the RAH Paisley and the Intensive Care Unit at Edinburgh Sick Kids. I cannot fault the care that Jack received in the NHS and I will always be thankful for everything they did for us.

I am forever seeing people complain about waiting times in A & E but nobody stops to think what these nurses could be dealing with behind the scenes. When I walked into A & E, I had no idea that they were resuscitating my son, for all I know, they could have been resuscitating another child in the next room.

I really do believe this photo depicts how those doctors and nurses must feel in the job that they do.

How must it feel to do that daily?

How do you tell a parent that their child is going to die?

How do watch a parent say goodbye to their child?

How do you come back into work again the next day and do that all over again?

I honestly don’t know how they do it but I do know that those doctors and nurses made the situation the best they could for us…..

They worked tirelessly to resuscitate my beautiful boy Jack,

They kept him alive and tried to give him the best possible chance but sadly his little body just couldn’t cope.

They let me hold him in my arms to die,

They let me lie and cuddle him once he had gone,

They let us wash him and put new pjs on him and they gave us much time as they could.

I will always remember the words...
Go hold your boys hand because you don’t know how much longer you woll get to hold it for and ...
Arlene, I’m sorry we couldn’t say your boy.

The most painful words but also the most beautiful way to put it.

I firmly believe these doctors and nurses are real life superheroes, next time we complain about our hospitals….take a minute to think about the job that these people do a daily basis. Could you do that job? I know for sure that I couldn’t.

To those doctors and nurses that fight hard to save our children and loved ones, thank you

Jack, I’d love alone could have saved, you never would have died 💔